i now know who to call brother and who to just call friends forever

Yesterday i screwed up REALLY bad playing my guitar dunno why my crusader ppl have LM on a steep down slope part of bedok resevior wif uncut grass (which i am SERIOUSLY ALEGIC TO) but never thats not the point. The point i nicholas chan screwed worst that i ever did before playing the guitar. I could not hold my guitar properly cause no strip could not see the chords cause everyone was standing up and i COULD not see the chords then just forget about me leading.
it was a total screw up i never felt so down and depressed in my ENTIRE LIFE. SO EMBARRASING MY FACE THROW TILL NOTHING LEFT ALREADY (at that moment after the first song i REALLY WANTED TO GO HOME AND NEVER TURN BACK EVER AGAIN)forget the crusade forget the people in crusade FORGET EVERYTHING! at that very moment. Yesterday evening was rated the day i will PAY ANY PRICE TO FORGET. i never felt so low and down EVER before . If not for GOD's voice in my heart tell me to stay and a sudden peace that the holy spirit imparted in me. I WOULD HAD REALLY LEFT WIF NO TURNING BACK.

HOWEVER!

THANK GOD I STAYED cause happen after that was something i would never expect. By then my eyes changed to my angry , upset and depressed eyes those that at least know me better would had felt and seen that change . However those that saw that was the surprise it was those that did not know me those i never talk to often those that i usually just say hi and bye that came and talk to me first. It was those year 1 ok la and jess she was the first that saw it after her was all year 1 which really took me by surprise. Cause seeing what they did and how the spend so much time even through my dinner to try to console me really touched my deeply (of course i won't show it la must act manly) however my spirits was really touched my their actions i never thought they amoug all people would come and talk to me . Dinner after that was really bad i lost complete appitite and could not even finish a small plate a fried rice WHICH was actually nice just that i no appitite to finish it.

Then after i left the year 1 msged me and ask me to keep strong then came other msgs from other ppl like yap and grace. (And i really thank you for showing your concern) gimme a few weeks and let me recover from this heavy blow before askin me to do anything STUPID again. -.-"

i am deeply touched by those to show care to me.
What i feel now can my discribe in the below java scrips try to understand it ok :


if(show concern to nicholas yesterday)
{
System.out.println("Tks Really appriciated that, i felt really loved by what you did");
}
else
{
System.out.println("thank GOD that he said love your ENIMIES as yourself in the bible");
}